|Just look out the window|
by Steve Kiser
I don't care about the weather
One of the many signs that your pool of conversation topics has run dry is when you resort to chatting about the weather.
Sure, it's a safe topic that you can discuss with a moderate amount of expertise (after all, most of us tend to go outside from time to time), but let's be honest, who really gets off talking about how miserable it is outside?
To begin with, when was the last time you heard two people argue over the weather? Never, because everybody agrees about it, which only further adds to the bor- ing as hell nature of talking about barometric pressure.
If it is 40 below outside and blowing snow into your face, I highly doubt anybody is going to put up a fight when you claim, "man, it is really nasty out there!"
For one second, just think about how idiotic it is to actually make the above observation. In all of your astuteness, you managed, without any help, to point out that the combination of sub-zero tem- peratures and blowing chunks of ice are less than pleasurable condi- tions to walk around in. Bravo.
And then there is the preten- tious way that people instigate these conversations.
As I was taking my garbage out the other day, I ran into one of my neighbours. It just so happened to be raining at the time, and rather than waste such a piece of conver- sation gold, Mr. Neighbour wan- dered over to me and asked, "Geez, wet enough for ya?"
How is a person supposed to respond to that? We were both standing in the pouring rain, our clothes getting even more drenched with each passing sec- ond, and apparently this fellow needed me to confirm for him that it was, in fact, "wet enough."
I answered with a simple "yes," to which he let out a hearty laugh and then began walking back inside. That was all he wanted. He was willing to stand outside for a further 10 seconds just to have me answer a question I'm pretty damn sure he already knew the answer to.
Why? Why do people choose to hold these pointless conversations?
Surely it can't be to partake in an intellectually stimulating debate, because if my aforemen- tioned neighbourly exchange is any indication, weather related dis- cussions are about as intellectual as the lyrics to a Pussycat Dolls song.
And I refuse to believe that these conversations take place because people have an unnatural love for all things weather related, otherwise I'm sure meteorology would be enjoying a spike in num- bers similar to the one that StarTek has been riding for years.
There are plenty of other things out there just begging to be dis- cussed on a daily basis. I implore you, the next time you find your- self talking about the weather over a cup of coffee with a friend/co- worker/family member, change the topic.
If we can nip this little problem in the bud right now, we will be saving future generations from the agony we know all too well.